apology

Apparently I was wrong about Peter reading my blog. I thought it was because someone with the same, internet service provider coming out of the same location looks at my blog and the way this person finds my blog is to type in key words from one the headings of my entries. As i looked closer it is someone out of Sac State

Any ways we are not doing much better. We had another big fight last night about same old same old. I told him that i did not know the reason he doesn't desire sex with me is because of all my relapses. i also told him that all this may be too late because i am no longer sexually attracted to him. i explained that i am still interested in sex just not with him because i have been hurt and rejected for so long. he got all pissed off about that which makes no sense to me because if a person gets to the point that they don't want to make love to their partner why the hell stay together? He also claimed that I never apologized to him before which i have and i remember we were in the car going over the highway 20 bridge and i listed all the things i had done wrong and that i was deeply sorry and that as i get to my 9th step it will be a more complete amends. So last night again i apologized for everything and told him the sad things is that in a year or less he will turn around and say i never said sorry to him. That is the way he is. Selective hearing all the time and another reason that i get so freakin pissed off at him. he only hears what he wants to hear.

I am getting an A still in my class. I had made up my test yesterday and got 95% and the quiz before that 100%. finals next week and then we are done. i am not going to go out and look for a job just yet. i am dong to good in school to give it all up just yet.