When Aiden is at school the house is so quiet I don't know what to do with myself. It is almost strange and often times I don't like being in my own head and that is exactly what being alone does. I'm not liking myself a whole lot these days and it is hard to be upbeat and chipper for my family. I am doing it but struggling with it. I don't think Peter has noticed so much because of his own worries. I got him a nice card yesterday that I wrote don't worry God has your back and so do I. I think it brightened his day and he said "huh, you really do like me."

It was 108 yesterday and it is supposed to be hot again today. The meeting hall has poor airconditioning so I don't think I will be going. Too hot and too smokey. I don't want to feel useless all day so I better think of something to do and get off my but and do it. Housecleaning gets old but it needs it so I may end up having to do that. Blah!